Pride – Freakish or Fun

I’ve always been a big one for gay pride marches, especially when there’s a bit of trans* pride in them as well, and although I’ve only been to one so far, I love the atmosphere, and I plan to get myself to two this year, so imagine my surprise when a transwoman said that she felt they were freakish.

I can sort of understand her perspective, taking a step back – it’s taking sexuality (or gender identity, but I’m focussing on sexuality right now) and running through a town absolutely parading it for everyone and anyone to see, and  I can understand why some people might prefer that it was kept private, “what you do in the bedroom is your own affair”, but calling it freakish did seem like a step too far, to say that to dress flamboyantly for a day, and parade in public for your equal rights was making yourself into a freak.

A freak, in this context, is somebody who is visibly different from the norm, but surely in this case a straight person at pride would be the ‘freak’ (I say, flippantly) because most people are there because they’re… guess what? Gay and Proud. I don’t think being gay is a particular achievement honestly, so I can see why people would be a bit leery of the idea of being proud of it, but for so long in Western culture it’s been presented as something to be ashamed of that maybe it’s right for one day to wear it proudly.

The other irritation was that this transwoman didn’t seem to realise that if being gay and wearing not-a-lot, or wearing bright colours or feathers in public was freakish, ebcause it wasn’t normal, what about being a male bodied person wearing female clothes? Surely, by her definition, that’s just as abnormal.

She went on to rant about activists. I am an activist, I don’t want to hide who I am, I want to pave the path for other people, that they might transition more easily. I’m only alive and sane now because other people have paved that path for me, and in turn I want to do it for others, I want to be a father figure to young transboys just finding their feet in the same way Michael has done for me.

To be a freak is to be abnormal. To be abnormal is deviating from the average. Surely transpeople do that in a way that few others do? And maybe it is something to be proud of, that we have the confidence and self assurance that we can walk through the streets saying “This is who I am, and you know what? I’m not going to change that”.

I was asked if I wanted to spend my life standing in the spotlight, or trying to be as normal as possible, and do you know what? I want to spotlight it, I want to do everything I can for the next generation of GBLTQ children to have it as easy as possible. If that means that my life is a level the harder, then so be it, I’ll do that, to ease it a bit more for the ones who come after.

I am writing this in response to an article written by David Crary from the Associated Press. The article can be found here:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081224/ap_on_re_us/obama_gays

What Melissa wrote and quoted in the article sums up my feelings on this whole Warren business:

“Before we change minds we must change hearts,” Etheridge wrote. “Maybe in our anger, as we consider marches and boycotts, perhaps we can consider stretching out our hands.”

I don’t agree at all with Obama choosing Warren, but I choose to look at the overall picture. Having the Lesbian and Gay Band is a positive statement for our community. Choosing Warren is a positive statement for their (“fundamental Christians”) community.

Why should it be all about the GLBT community? It’s about PEOPLE. We all have our likes and dislikes, our individual political stances, our own causes, our own beliefs. We will never ALL agree. Period.

Yes – I’m a part of the GLBT community, and I stand up for my rights and the rights of our community. I am out at certain protests and rallies. But I’m not going to stoop to the level of HATE like they have done.

Just my .02 cents for early this Christmas Eve day.

Seize the day!
 Michael